Lovey Dovey Sheikah Shim Sham is a romance visual-novel simulation umbrella game starring the character of Impa from the The Legend of Zelda series. The game features multiple endings and was created for the first Lapis Wiki Challenge Rebooted.
Impa learns of a way to keep herself alive for much longer than a mere mortal would be able to live for. The way to do this is to meet her soulmate and have their hearts "bound by a thread of blood red". Zelda vows to help Impa and sets out on a quest to find the perfect person for Impa to love.... maybe.
Impa gives Zelda a week to find her soulmate. If her soulmate has not been found by week's end, Impa is concerned she would be too weak to perform the "ritual".
> Day 1
"In order to live, Impa needs to become bound by a thread of blood red with her soulmate. So that's what I am doing." Zelda stands, hands on hips, as she looks over the village crested by the glowing yellow sun.
"Soulmate, soulmate. Where would Impa's be?" she mutters, climbing onto the back of the tall brown horse she brought with her. She would prefer to ride atop her giant Loftwing, but the birds decided to stay behind in their skyward home, Skyloft. Zelda, Link and the others who travelled to the surface have since been riding these creatures they have named "horses".
|The main protagonist of the game is an old Sheikah woman by the name of Impa. She describes herself as far past her due date, though wishes to aid Zelda for as long as the young girl lives.|
|The sole playable character and the deutragonist of the game, Zelda commits herself to finding Impa's long-lost soulmate. If no person is found by week's end, she tries to use herself as Impa's soulmate, though she just ends up committing suicide days later after "unforeseen events".|
|The first person Zelda meets on her journey is an anthropomorphic pig who goes by the name of "Miss Piggy". Piggy is vain and is extremely committed to those she loves. She slowly reveals that her last love - a man named Kermit - disappeared one day, and now she yearns to fill the hole left by him. She gives one of the "good" endings.|
|One of the first people Zelda meets is a young inventor named Phineas. He is outgoing and smart, and Zelda later learns that Impa does not care for ages, making him a viable choice for her soulmate (and Impa a potential pedophile). He gives a special ending known as the "good??? I think? Maybe? Uhhhh...." ending, though this later ends with Phineas murdering Impa.|
|A white dog with a plate on its back and fire... or something. The final person Zelda meets on her journey, and brings the dog to Impa as a last resort, earning a "good" ending.|
|The Prime Minister of Canada, whom Zelda meets one day. He's extremely odd, and he always speaks in a loud yell as if giving a speech. Oddly, he carries around a large pink dildo, which he uses as a microphone replacement. He gives a "good" ending.|
|For some reason, Peach doesn't wear any clothes, instead having black bars that shield her... ahem, private parts *wink* from the player. She doesn't understand anything about romance, though is still very protective of her body. She earns a "good" ending, though only if Zelda can teach peach the ways of romance will her ending be achieved. To do this, she must cook her a cake for some reason. This makes Peach's route the most challenging to get.|
|The fuck is this shit!? Well whatever. Zelda tries to convince this fucker to help Impa. He doesn't though, instead opting to try and kill Zelda so Impa could die and the animatronics could rule. After completing every other route, it is revealed that this antagonist is actually the soulmate of Impa... kind of.|
|Upon first meeting him, Zelda thinks he and Impa would look beautiful together, instantly shipping the two together and calling this ship the Poopa. Too bad he's not her soulmate. Aside from Zelda herself, he is the only character who gives a "bad" ending. But seriously, Poopbutt x Impa is my otp.|
|Hitler zum Führer von Deutschland, und der Führer der Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiter politischen Partei zu sein. Obwohl extrem gefährlich, schmiedet Impa eine einseitige Auge auf diesen bösen bösen Menschen. Er gibt Zelda einen "guten" Ende welchem Grund auch immer.
Eh close enough.
|She's a murdererererer. She's a rebeller person. She's Katniss Everdeen. She was forced to do some evil things like fall in love with a baker and ride a train. Also murder people. Zelda doesn't give her a second thought at first but Katniss would later become Zelda's soulmate.|
|Katniss' clone is a blue-haired, green-lipped, red-eyed woman named Katnip Evergreen. Unlike Katniss, she hasn't fallen in love with a baker or ridden a train (or murdererered, I guess), but she does smoke weed every day. Early in the game, she thinks that she is an animatronic bunny named Bonnie, and wears a costume until the last day, where she takes it off to reveal that she is Impa's soulmate. Except she's not and that's a lie because she's just high.|
|Impa's real soulmate, who appears after getting every other ending. She is Zelda's great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great grate great great granddaughter/reincarnation. She acts like Zelda in like zero ways, speaking with a prim and proper posh accent.|